My Family

I encountered abuse within my family and found myself too controlling and abusive as well. I was manipulated, put down, and controlled to the point where I felt emotionally paralyzed by certain family. These control issues included financial abuse where I was put in debt, shamed for spending money, and belittled for needing basic necessities.

My social life was also controlled and monitored. I was told who I could hang out with and who I could not hang out with. I was told what I could and could not say to friends. I was also shamed by certain family for being ill, for not being a doctor, and for being unsuccessful. I was directly put down through comparisons of others and false accusations against my character.

I was mislabeled, emotionally attacked, and  ridiculed.  Certain members of the family also trivialized the abuse I went through and exhibited gross insensitivity. The toxic environment I lived in was contagious to my spirit, and I found myself negative in attitude. The effects of my being abused affected me to the point where I felt paralyzed in decision-making. I questioned myself and blamed myself for other's actions, and I was susceptible to more abuse outside my family. I was disabled, mentally ill, and poverty-stricken due to chronic, consistent, intense abuse for over 25 years of my life.

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