Trauma Caused My Poor Mental Health

About eight years after I became sick, I found a psychiatrist who did psychotherapy and who spent time to listen carefully, understand, and empathize with me as a human being. He removed the labels that I had been stuck with by various psychiatrists and said it was a history of trauma that shaped my mental health.

My Advice to You:

-If you are suffering from bad mental health, research your psychiatrist and give preference to one that does psychotherapy in conjunction with medical management. Also, choose one that listens well to his/her patients and seeks to understand you and your history.

-If you are attempting to go off medications, be careful coming off medications; be aware that you may become suicidal.

-If you are on medications, be aware of the side effects of medicines.

-Know that when you are vulnerable, it leaves you susceptible to predatory people.

-Some people will use your mental health against you to excuse their own bad behavior. 

-Most mentally ill people are not dangerous, and most mentally ill people have some insight into their situation. They do not want to be viewed as dangerous, incompetent or stupid, and they do not want to be pitied.

-Do not be a bystander. Reach out to those who need help, and don't make them feel guilty for needing that help either. They don't want to ask for help, but often bad mental health disables the person from living a good life and supporting themselves.

-Accept responsibility for your actions. I have been guilty of my own bad decisions. Not anyone else.

-On over-apologizing: Don’t let guilt-trippers abuse you emotionally. A sensitive person will recognize your genuine remorse and not beat you down with guilt.

-During my trauma, I would spend money on psychics trying to figure out how to get out of my situation. As a result, I felt even more despair and unhappiness, and I felt even more ill. Luckily, I had the sense not to believe certain things; I strongly suspect that although well-intentioned, psychics can make people delusional and alter mental health outcomes for the worse. Please avoid them. They are not bad people, but they can convey distorted, inaccurate perceptions that not only create confusion but a pervasive despair.

-Mental health must be managed. There may be relapses. Changes in environment or another trauma may retrigger mental health problems. Be aware of this issue and be ready to take steps in order to get through it.

-The expression of mental illness is not black and white. My general feeling is some people stereotype a diagnosis as a set of criteria that the person must exhibit. I don't feel that this perception is accurate. Some people express degrees of symptoms from mild to moderate to severe (and this is exemplified by the level of genetic expression as well). Depending on the severity of the illness, the individual's ability to control certain behaviors may be limited. Also, you must take into account that some people have more self-control and more self-awareness pertaining to their illness.

I have had an individual accuse me of not being ill, and some people make assumptions that I am not disabled and that I am lazy. The reason why I don't appear ill is because I am self-aware, and I have the education and knowledge to combat my condition. It doesn't mean that I don't suffer or that I am not disabled. I also want to point out that in certain areas, I can function better. This may confuse people. For example, if I can read a book and thus occupy my mind, that does not mean I can function in other areas necessarily. For example, when my mind is not occupied to a certain degree, it is difficult for me to block out certain memories due to trauma. Due to the inability to block certain thoughts, I may struggle with other tasks such as washing dishes. It may seem like a simpler task to people because it's not reading but understand that reading occupies my though process. Washing the dishes does not. 

Additionally, who surrounds you may alter the course of your illness. Due to chronic abuse and financial hardship, my illness has spiraled out of control many times. If you have the finances to separate yourself from unhealthy people, do it. You will see a remarkable change. Cut abusive, judgmental, and accusatory people out of your life, and you will see yourself heal faster. 

On being sexually used, raped, and/or abused:

-Emotional violation can lead to unhealthy behaviors of denial where the individual returns to the user/rapist/abuser to regain a sense of control and internal reconciliation which creates false perceptions of justice and closure. It’s a vicious cycle.

-Sexuality is a part of you but not all of you. The media at times misrepresents sexuality as if that’s all there is to be a woman. Sometimes there is again, the hyper-sexuality of a woman as if a woman is sex and not even a human being.

Which leads me to say this:

With regards to sex, men and women have a right to change their minds about sex. I have heard of too many people guilt-tripped into having or continuing sex. They are not objects. No one is entitled to you and vice versa. Communicate with your partner if you feel or are feeling pressured into sex and stand your ground. Make sure your communication is clear and direct.

  

-Suicide is a mental health issue not a choice.  Do not make accusations that suicidal people are selfish, crazy, bad, etc. And please do not ignore them. Recommend appropriate help.

 

Suicide is often provoked by significant mental health problems and/or trauma-based thinking. Claiming suicide is a choice insinuates a more level-headed (reason-oriented), deliberate action. Claiming suicide is a choice also disregards the mental health and/or environment of the individual.

For example, if an individual was abused, there is a lot of evidence that people are wired for relationships. Our brain at a young age develops according to the quality of our relationships, specifically our ability to reason and perceive the world around us is affected. When our relationships are strained significantly at any point of time in our lives (especially at a young age), it may affect our mental health temporarily or even permanently depending on the severity of the situation and our genes.

One interesting field, the field of epigenetics, highlights how gene expression can be altered due to abuse. These alterations in gene expression (due to a bad environment in this case) can support the idea that suicidal ideation is in part, biological and in a sense, part of a disease.

-Trauma can trigger mental illness. Trauma must be addressed as well as mental illness.

-Prostitutes and those in the sex industry need assistance, understanding, and an exit strategy, not condemnation. Prostitutes and those in the sex industry may justify their actions out of self-protection and denial. Understand where they are coming from, and be gentle.